An Open Letter To the Bitch Who Steals My Treadmill

Dear Runner Whore,

While I appreciate the fact that you typically serve as a marker that I’m 1/3 of the way through my workout with my trainer, I do not appreciate that you insist on taking my treadmill. Yes, I’m claiming the left treadmill as my own. Especially since I am there at 5:45a, and you are not. And I know that you know I’m using that treadmill as part of an interval training since you fucking see me on it every time you come into the complex gym.  I realize that the other treadmill may or may not be broken, but I don’t give a fuck. Use the elliptical. 

It is outrageous to me that you insist on taking my treadmill without so much as asking are you finished using this. And despite the fact that you are apparently training for a marathon, I prefer to not bust my ass on the bike on leg day.  The casual way you ignore the fact I’m in there working towards a goal is annoying to me. Not as annoying as when you watch the cooking channel over my music, but pretty close. 

In conclusion, maybe you should fucking lift something and get some muscle. Or maybe you should sleep in. 


*disclaimer – I am aware that we cannot claim gym equipment so spare me the fucking etiquette lecture. You do 150RPM on leg day between every set


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